“You” decide to have a baby….(yeh the world also pressurizes you to have a baby, but that’s not the point here), “You” decide how to bring them up. “You” decide what clothes to buy for them. “You” decide which school to enroll them.
Then “You” start to buy them what they like — toys, books, clothes, jewellery etc. “You” cook what they like.
When your children are growing up you tell others so proudly “oh they have a mind of their own”, “oh they have their own style of clothes” “oh they chose this stream for their college/higher education”, “oh they decided to take up this company’s offer”, “oh they decided to buy this car, build this house, they are managing 5-10 members in their office team”, “oh people value their opinion and listen to them” etc etc.
But, when it comes to your kids getting married, the maturity and their choice and “your” approval and liking alone IS JUST NOT ENOUGH???. For this, your sibling’s inlaws, those inlaw’s inlaws and their siblings, your cousins you meet once in a year or never meet, your neighbours and their siblings and their inlaws and their friends and friends of friends, your milkman and his family, his friends and his siblings, your neighbourhood grocer, his family, his inlaws and extended family will all have to be happy. Everybody else’s happiness and approval matters more than your child’s choice and happiness and your approval. Ain’t this such a skewed logic??? IF my child is happy, I am happy – this does not bear weight any more???
Why do some people just NOT get it??? If “YOU” approve, the world will approve. IF YOU SMILE, the world smiles with you. If you grumble and curse, the world will make it that much worse for you.